Reply To: Seeking Those from An Orthodox Background

[ng]

#10426

Hello Binyamin,
I don’t come specifically from a yeshivishe background, I was a ger, sephardi Modox Machmir and actually never felt ‘right’ among FFB/BT yeshivishe-oriented peers (but did go to O.S. in Monsey, visited Lakewood ONCE and survived…). Though I no longer identify as Jewish (having been a ger, that might be understandable to an FFB), and also due to a still-elaborating disentanglement with the notions of Rabbinic Judaism/Perushim-claimed historical hegemonies (on the parameters of defining Jewish/Jews, beliefs, practice, what “judaism taught/teaches”, etc), but I definitely understand a measure of the simple ‘cultural’ awkwardness and ‘not quite fitting in’, even though I was only Odox for about 10 years – I still had fostered the desired dissonance with the NJ world around me and about me, and in terms of my past. But if you grew up frum, I can definitely imagine what dissonance you may feel, in particular, having been around many such families. To my mind, spiritually there IS continuity with ‘observant judaism’, in terms of specific aspects that Orthodox [rabbinic] Judaism has maintained and contained, and Catholicism – not on Rabbinic terms, but Christ’s terms with his people, in liturgy and the various theological ‘ologies’, also continuity around Beit haMikdash, korbanot, role of Israel, but I disgress…

*Without bringing up your Catholicism* per se, you might find help with OTD forums, etc, in terms of generally relating to all the non-Jewish ‘worlds’ outside of the ‘eruv’, and might help piece together where the ‘disconnects’ may be between yourself and parish life. It IS a whole other cultural/communal experience, and if you haven’t had other cultural experiences, that may be at the heart of it. Myself, I was Chrismated (Confirmed), in a Middle Eastern Byzantine Catholic where culturally, people are very hospitable, etc – whereas many Roman Catholic communities, especially in the US, are notable not that way by comparison, and not infrequently perfunctory and ‘brisk’ – I have NO problem with that, in fact I DO recognize a measure of similarity from “ffb” synagogue experiences in the past, and have found the “anonymity” sometimes what I’d prefer in a Mass/Liturgy.

There is a volume in the last few years translated from French by a BT from a French-Maghrib family who became yeshivishe then a Chabadnik (yes, long strange trip), and now Catholic, called “from the kippah to the cross” by Jean-Marie Élie Setbon. That also may be helpful, I’m not sure he’s fluent in English though, as I did reach out to him in French, but he gave only a brief “hello” response, and didn’t seem to want to connect. Best of grace in finding your situation in Christ!
NG